Tebow-Gate: As Breaking As The Wind
posted by David Cloninger, 7/24/2009 11:11:00 PM
I want to holler,
You make me steamy,
Under the collar.”
------------------- DEVO
Just when I thought that a reporter – and I use that in a term looser than a three-year-old’s front teeth – couldn’t sink any lower, along comes the biggest story out of SEC Media Days.
Some coach (Steve Spurrier, as it turned out) didn’t vote for Tim Tebow as first-team All-SEC quarterback.
Gasp!
I voiced this opinion rather loudly. Some writer who obviously doesn’t know what I’m about spluttered, “But he’s 6-3 and 255 pounds! He was capped in the bench at 465! He’s so holy! How can you not vote him first-team QB?”
I replied, “The point is, who cares?”
This is not news.
Or at least, not the news it was made out to be.
ESPN covered this like someone said Richard Petty couldn’t carry Dale Earnhardt’s mustache brush. Headlines screamed all over that Spurrier had dissed his alma mater and former coaching stop by willfully and callously not voting for the greatest player in college football history (the man-crush may be deserved but it is rather tiring).
Spurrier admitted the mistake, blaming it on miscommunication within the office and saying he should have handled it better. He looked about as comfortable as Lindsay Lohan in a convent while doing it.
To me, that is where the story ends. Mistake made, rectified, presto! Carry on.
This is why I figured out long ago that I was apparently born under a sign granting me a trait not often found amongst the humans – common freaking sense.
First off, it’s a preseason team. Preseason. I’m sure Tebow and the rest of the league know how good he is from the past three years, not this year’s preseason poll.
Second, the snub didn’t hurt Tebow in the least, personally or on the list. He still made first-team quarterback (as if he cares, considering he has two national championship rings and didn’t wear them this week). Then he said, “I’m not going to run sprints thinking about a coach that didn’t vote for me.”
Third, I believe the last thing Spurrier would want to do is intentionally make Tebow or any of the Gators mad. He didn’t say a word last year and lost 56-6. What could possibly be gained by purposely voting against Tebow – a 75-point loss?
Fourth, even though a sort-of story popped up about the voting process, it still doesn’t change the fact that it’s a preseason team. Don’t know about you, but if I’m a football coach, I’ve got a lot more on my mind during the preseason than voting in some meaningless poll that doesn’t count for much more than a salad crouton – like, say, beating my rival more than once every five years.
Fifth, it’s nobody’s business who anybody voted for. That’s why it’s called a secret ballot. To quote the fine Eric “Otter” Stratton, “Isn’t this an indictment of our entire American society?”
Sixth, I realize the season is just beginning and it’s the end of a long, slow summer. But does ESPN really have nothing better to do than cover this like the seventh game of the World Series? It was a small news story, you found it, you reported it, congratulations. Now let it go.
Spurrier admitted he messed up during his opening statement. He apologized.
He was then asked five more times, in the same press conference, about it. After the fifth time, Spurrier said he’d talk with the questioner about it later and not in front of the room, which had already heard it in the opening statement and four previous questions.
I finished my work on Friday and drove home. I got to Columbia around 9 p.m. I called up ESPN.com.
Spurrier was still on the front page. Beside the package, headlines read, “FSU sues to force NCAA to release documents,” “Report: Tebow has $2M injury insurance policy,” “Notre Dame alumni prep for game vs. Japan” and “Pay-to-play: Boise St. will visit Va. Tech in 2010.”
Those stories are news. Those are interesting, intriguing pieces.
Yet a 64-year-old man admitting that he didn’t look closely at a preseason ballot because he was preparing his team for the upcoming season, which is coincidentally what he’s paid to do, is being bandied about as the biggest news since peanut butter met jelly.
I guess it could have been worse.
Spurrier could have asked Tebow about his sex life, which was also a private topic until some, ahem, “reporter,” uncovered that scorching news tip a day earlier.
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“When I see you,
I want to holler,
You make me steamy,
Under the collar.”
------------------- DEVO
Just when I thought that a reporter – and I use that in a term looser than a three-year-old’s front teeth – couldn’t sink any lower, along comes the biggest story out of SEC Media Days.
Some coach (Steve Spurrier, as it turned out) didn’t vote for Tim Tebow as first-team All-SEC quarterback.
Gasp!
I voiced this opinion rather loudly. Some writer who obviously doesn’t know what I’m about spluttered, “But he’s 6-3 and 255 pounds! He was capped in the bench at 465! He’s so holy! How can you not vote him first-team QB?”
I replied, “The point is, who cares?”
This is not news.
Or at least, not the news it was made out to be.
ESPN covered this like someone said Richard Petty couldn’t carry Dale Earnhardt’s mustache brush. Headlines screamed all over that Spurrier had dissed his alma mater and former coaching stop by willfully and callously not voting for the greatest player in college football history (the man-crush may be deserved but it is rather tiring).
Spurrier admitted the mistake, blaming it on miscommunication within the office and saying he should have handled it better. He looked about as comfortable as Lindsay Lohan in a convent while doing it.
To me, that is where the story ends. Mistake made, rectified, presto! Carry on.
This is why I figured out long ago that I was apparently born under a sign granting me a trait not often found amongst the humans – common freaking sense.
First off, it’s a preseason team. Preseason. I’m sure Tebow and the rest of the league know how good he is from the past three years, not this year’s preseason poll.
Second, the snub didn’t hurt Tebow in the least, personally or on the list. He still made first-team quarterback (as if he cares, considering he has two national championship rings and didn’t wear them this week). Then he said, “I’m not going to run sprints thinking about a coach that didn’t vote for me.”
Third, I believe the last thing Spurrier would want to do is intentionally make Tebow or any of the Gators mad. He didn’t say a word last year and lost 56-6. What could possibly be gained by purposely voting against Tebow – a 75-point loss?
Fourth, even though a sort-of story popped up about the voting process, it still doesn’t change the fact that it’s a preseason team. Don’t know about you, but if I’m a football coach, I’ve got a lot more on my mind during the preseason than voting in some meaningless poll that doesn’t count for much more than a salad crouton – like, say, beating my rival more than once every five years.
Fifth, it’s nobody’s business who anybody voted for. That’s why it’s called a secret ballot. To quote the fine Eric “Otter” Stratton, “Isn’t this an indictment of our entire American society?”
Sixth, I realize the season is just beginning and it’s the end of a long, slow summer. But does ESPN really have nothing better to do than cover this like the seventh game of the World Series? It was a small news story, you found it, you reported it, congratulations. Now let it go.
Spurrier admitted he messed up during his opening statement. He apologized.
He was then asked five more times, in the same press conference, about it. After the fifth time, Spurrier said he’d talk with the questioner about it later and not in front of the room, which had already heard it in the opening statement and four previous questions.
I finished my work on Friday and drove home. I got to Columbia around 9 p.m. I called up ESPN.com.
Spurrier was still on the front page. Beside the package, headlines read, “FSU sues to force NCAA to release documents,” “Report: Tebow has $2M injury insurance policy,” “Notre Dame alumni prep for game vs. Japan” and “Pay-to-play: Boise St. will visit Va. Tech in 2010.”
Those stories are news. Those are interesting, intriguing pieces.
Yet a 64-year-old man admitting that he didn’t look closely at a preseason ballot because he was preparing his team for the upcoming season, which is coincidentally what he’s paid to do, is being bandied about as the biggest news since peanut butter met jelly.
I guess it could have been worse.
Spurrier could have asked Tebow about his sex life, which was also a private topic until some, ahem, “reporter,” uncovered that scorching news tip a day earlier.
Link to this entry - Discuss this entry - Return to Blog Home


David Cloninger. David is a full-time staff writer for GamecockCentral, and covers Gamecock football, men's basketball, baseball and recruiting. He may be reached by email at david(at)gamecockcentral.com. Replace (at) with @.